The Bright Side of Breakups

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Maybe you’ll find that all you want is two new men that you can flaunt. Ben and Jerry, the perfect pair! No other man can compare. These two guys, no judgment passed As they stick right to your ass. Get out your stretch pants, now is the time! Being sloppy is no longer a crime. Throw out those razors, hair is in! Don’t even bother giving it a trim. Ben and Jerry, they don’t care Even if you look like a grizzly bear. All day, everyday, twenty four seven, These two men will make you feel like heaven. Don’t you worry about getting any fatter, Get yourself some sweet Cake Batter! No more late-night nookie? Dig into Mint Chocolate Cookie! Or when you’re simply not in the mood, Sink into a pint of playful Phish Food! If you’re in need of a pick-me-up, Get yourself a bowl of Peanut Butter Cup! Or when you can’t see the good in goodbye, Indulge yourself in some Boston Cream Pie! Still feel like you have an issue? Don’t you reach for that measly tissue!              That won’t help you like these two can.                                      Pick up a pint of Butter Pecan! Ben and Jerry, the perfect pair! Did I mention they’re billionaires? So remember, my friend, don’t you cry; You are with the best of guys. -Karen Wathen

Maybe you’ll find that all you want

is two new men that you can flaunt.

Ben and Jerry, the perfect pair!

No other man can compare.

These two guys, no judgment passed

As they stick right to your ass.

Get out your stretch pants, now is the time!

Being sloppy is no longer a crime.

Throw out those razors, hair is in!

Don’t even bother giving it a trim.

Ben and Jerry, they don’t care

Even if you look like a grizzly bear.

All day, everyday, twenty four seven,

These two men will make you feel like heaven.

Don’t you worry about getting any fatter,

Get yourself some sweet Cake Batter!

No more late-night nookie?

Dig into Mint Chocolate Cookie!

Or when you’re simply not in the mood,

Sink into a pint of playful Phish Food!

If you’re in need of a pick-me-up,

Get yourself a bowl of Peanut Butter Cup!

Or when you can’t see the good in goodbye,

Indulge yourself in some Boston Cream Pie!

Still feel like you have an issue?

Don’t you reach for that measly tissue!

             That won’t help you like these two can.                                     

Pick up a pint of Butter Pecan!

Ben and Jerry, the perfect pair!

Did I mention they’re billionaires?

So remember, my friend, don’t you cry;

You are with the best of guys.

-Karen Wathen